E-mail corrospondance... i see all my flaws... but he sees something else.


~from me to him
-Subject: Hello
Hiya,

Sundays at church are an interesting and slightly awkward time for me to express relativly accuratly how I am doing. At the moment when the question is asked, I am in the house of the Lord, set to praise him, and rejoice in him, so I am doing wonderful, regardless of anything going on in my life. But sometimes during the weeks, days, or even hours before arriving, I'm a mess -- and I don't want to overlook or ignore it because it is often waiting for me soon after I leave church. Because I love you as my brother in Christ, I will share with you more details.
Monday, December 19, 2005, was my last day of working for the week. It was a very busy week at work, and very difficult because I felt as though I was called upon to take care of the entire store by myself because the manager simply reguarly spends his time at work, sleeping. So while there were very long lines of customers, the store's policy is that I page over the loudspeaker, and someone else comes to open another register to help ring up their purchases faster. But on night shift, there is no one else to come help. I could get into more details about work, but the overall point is that I felt overworked, so I planned to spend my week before Christmas, doing absolutly nothing, just to relax and rest. In theory it sounds like a good and fine idea. But me spending time doing nothing is an open invitation for me to waste my efforts playing videogames, dropping my guard, and falling into temptation to sin. That is one aspect of things.
On Friday before Christmas, i lost my best friend. I didn't lose her to death or anything of that nature, we simply are no longer talking to eachother... We had been best friends for over 3 years. losing her left a hole in my heart. i seriously felt a hole where it used to be whole.
We didn't have small group that week, few people were in church on Christmas day, we didn't have small group that week either, and I had to go back in to work a day earlier than I expected. Few people came in to the store that week, so that was good. New Years day, at church, when we started singing worship songs, my heart just let go and fell appart into worship. the first song we sang, i never heard it before, but i was almost to the point of tears from the first line. it was about God's awesomeness, and it just felt so wonderful to sing his praises... I know from God's promises throughout his word that everything I'm going through right now will be good, and for his glory. I don't know anything else right now, so I cling to that.
As far as general other stuff, I have almost $700 saved up, I need to move by January 31, and have no idea where I will be going. This past week I've been off from work and have made no real progress in finding a place to move to. Ads in the newspaper and online look like a mass of jibberish and I don't know how to sort through it yet. I can pay up to $500 a month for a 1 bedroom appartment, or possibly $650 for a 2 bedroom because I have a friend that is willing to room with me. I'm looking in South/SouthWest/West Philly.
As long as this e-mail is, it's pretty much a complete summary of these past 4 weeks of my life.

~In Christ


~from him to me
-Subject: It's about time
Once again, {my friend} was right, God is strong with you,or the other way around or both. When I read youremails I think to myself, why don't I feel this way?Or, wow, he's a "real" christian. I'm not downplayingmy faith, but I am a babe in christ. I am shortattentioned span and give easy into sin. You remind meof what is is to be a christian. Your faith isadmirable. So many times, once I see what God has donefor me, I remember how awesome God is. I need to knowthat before, during and after whatever I am goingthrough. I shared your feelings over the holiday, Imissed two services, and I missed three, (andtomorrow, four) home groups. I am done with homegroups for now, because of school.I am sorry about you losing your friend. I have feltthat type of loss, I lost good friends before. Itsucks, but once again you faith is inspiring, itdefinitely made me stop and think about faith.I mentioned that I had a spare room you could stay inuntil you found a place. Screw that. If you want youcan have that room. The rent will be around $275, it's in North Philly, at {---} Hey, what's your phone numberagain? Christs's peace be with you-