--exerpt from my journal--
I don't have a culture* of my own. a culture is needed. I've decided periodically people who's personality & culture I like & grabbed bits & pieces from them... until they had nothing more to give... or wouldn't/couldn't give me any more -- kinda working like a leech/parasite. Strange collage -- my patchwork-self. A beautiful array of colors that blends into the background like an overly elaborate painting on the wall. -- If looked at individually one could find a connecting point, a uniquely heart touching portion that makes the painting so endearing -- yet that is the very thing that lures its victims in for its own survival. If looked at in the larger context of the room, just about everything else seems to fit just as well, with the painting being nothing special as it fills a spot on the wall.**

*i am not sure if the term culture is quite right, but it is at least the best fitting term for now.
**each element of this description has more elaborate aspects behind it -- i may write them sometime.